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And, I do mean ANYTHING!

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;-)

About Last Night: Burlesque With Aubrey O'Day

Last Saturday, I had the pleasure of going to my first "industry" event, at Enclave, in downtown Chicago, where I met one of my favorite people in the entertainment business...Aubrey O'Day! Yes, I met Aubrey from Danity Kane! We shook hands, hugged, and took photos! I'm sorry, I'm having one of those "fag attacks" right now. You know, its like a heart attack, but happens whenever a Gay man so much as shares the same air as one of his favorite divas. Get it now?

This was also my first time going to Enclave, mainly because its a "straight" nightclub. So, I was a little new to both the "industry" thing as well as the "straight club" thing. Plus, my buddies "M" and "G" didn't want to come, so I was flying solo. But, there were a few "industry gays" there too, so I didn't feel too lost. Either way, it was a good way to get my feet wet for these kind of events with red carpets, photogs, and other professionals. It also opened my eyes to the other side of being a single twenty-something living in the big city, and the fact that life does actually exists outside of my Gayborhood.

The club was beautiful, as if they had taken a piece of Los Angeles and dropped it in the middle of downtown Chicago. I could definitely see how West coast Celebrities can feel at home when partying at Enclave. The burlesque show, hosted by Miss O'Day, featured Vegas performances by La Couture, ..., all capped off with an act from "Peep Show" staring Aubrey. The girls were absolutely amazing, and had the crowd completely mesmerized, including myself. I couldn't even take my Gay eyes away from this performance art. Seeing the burlesque performance also inspired me to find my inner "Showman".

;-)

Where The Hell Have I Been?!?

Its feels like its been years since I've posted or written anything! The weird thing is that I've been drafting a lot of posts, but procrastinated when it came to finishing anything. Since my last post, in January, I've been so busy and drained from both school and work. But, I'm back now, have lots to write about. For some reason, I feel like certain classes that I've been taking in college have been stifling me on a creative level...I guess.

I'll be back to posting before this coming weekend.

;-)

Ready Or Not?

"So...Are you ready for love?"

Its weird how a simple yes or no question can be so complex at the same time. Not only is it complex, its a loaded question at that. I hate loaded questions. Some loaded questions put me that mode called "your damned if you do, your damned if you don't". The guy that in currently
dating, on a casual basis, asked me the above question, last night, via a phone conversation.

He asked if I was "ready for love", and after I got on my invisible soapbox and read him the riot act for asking me such a loaded question, I said "I don't know". After that, the conversation shifted, and I once again had to pull out my soapbox to give him my half-feminist half-militant speech on how I feel about relationships in general. Basically, I told him that relationships are institutions of control, I would be damned if I ever allowed another man to have control over me, and that I like having the freedom to do what/who ever I please. I was being honest. Some days, I wish that I were in one of those "loving" relationships. But, other days, I'm glad to have my freedom as a single man in his twenties.

Once upon a time, I did honestly want to fall in "love" with the man of my dreams and have my first and maybe last boyfriend. I lived in the fairy tale delusion that if I found my "Prince Charming", that his "love" would solve all of my problems and clean up the mess known as Me. Well, the Universe bitch slapped into reality. I found him, fell in "love" with him, he broke my heart, and he ended up choosing to be with someone who's less complicated than me. I personally don't feel like going through that experience all over again. I licked my wounds, grew
up, and now I'm smart enough to know not to let it happen again. Its kind of like the verse from that Rihanna song, "Rehab", "...And I'll never give myself to another the way I gave it to you...Don't even recognize the ways you hurt me do you?".

Is anyone ever REALLY ready for "love"?

;-)

Mr. Wine vs. Mr. Tequlia...The Age-Old Battle

A few weeks ago, I was chatting with a longtime buddy of mine. To make a long story short, I liked him years ago, he didn't act interested, I grew up and realized exactly the type of guys I really liked, he came back around, told me he had a "thing" for me now, and I basically had to break it to him that he wasn't my "type" anymore. In breaking this news to him, a funny notion started cooking in my mind. And, it made perfect sense. I'm hoping it'll make to you guys and gals too.

Let me be the first to say it...Men are like cocktails. Some guys are smooth and sophisticated, like wine. While others are wild and leave you with a hangover, like tequila or whatever hard liquor you might prefer. After taking a minute to really think about it, I realized that its not
only true, but the philosophical battle between the two, Mr. Wine and Mr. Tequila, has been going on for ages. And, most recently, they've been having a tennis match in my own head.

Like I mentioned before, "wine" guys are smooth and sophisticated. They also tend to older, drama free, tame, mature, and more straightforward about their feelings. Case in point, I actually dated a "wine" guy for almost two months. I also hooked up with one this past Summer, but, that's for another time. Anyway, I met a massage therapist by the name
of "Hands" in August. We met while I was modeling shirtless at the Chicago Pride booth, at Market Days. At first, it was just a passing flirtation while I handed him a flyer. But, little did I know that Hands and I would end up meeting that night, at a downtown club.

While at Shadow Bar, with my guys, Hands and I ran into each other as if fate itself had willed it so. I thought he was cute, he liked how I looked with my shirt off, and two minutes of witty conversation later we were exchanging numbers. We ended up talking and texting ourselves into that following Mondays' mid-afternoon lunch date at a downtown "gourmet" burger spot that I had seen on the Zagat site. The date went really well. As it turned out, Hands was a 32 year-old educated, well-traveled, driven, sweetheart who worked in Chicago's Financial District while pursuing a career as a massage therapist. We hit it off well, even though I was a little put off by our age difference. I mean, lets face it, while he was hitting puberty, I was still in diapers and potty training.

During the course of us dating, I noticed that he liked me a lot more than I liked him. Apparently, he felt the "spark", while I, on the other hand, didn't. I liked Hands, but, I just didn't feel "over the moon" about him. After we parted I realized what was really wrong. To anyone else, Hands would be "Mr. Right". But, to me, he was boring. He was too nice, too tame, didn't like going out or partying much, and he was too easy to be with. Basically, Hands was a "Wine" guy. He wasn't wild, crazy, adventurous, fun, and challenging puzzle...like a "Tequila" guy...like H.B., who I've spent a lot of time with last Summer, or like the other guys that I'm attracted to.

Does this all mean that I'm secretly attracted to..."bad boys"?

;-)

He Don't Wanna Kiss...He Just Wants to Fuck Fuck Fuck.

This post was originally going to be called; "So, He Won't Kiss You...Yet, He Wants a Blowjob, To Blow Your Back Out, and Possibly Have You Climb His Back." But, I figured that would have been too much of a mouth full.

I was at work the other night, talking with one of my gal pals, when the conversation veered off into sex and men. Mainly, the weird sexual hangups that some men seem to have. Like, for example, how a straight guy might refuse to passionately kiss a girl that he's fucking around with, yet, this same guy will eat her pussy until the cows come home. Isn't it odd how these great discussions seem to start when yours truly is around?

I got to thinking about the alternate Gay version of this conundrum. You know, that Gay guy, usually a "top", who doesn't want to kiss nor blow the other guy he's hooking up with (or on a date with), yet, expects to get served some ass with a blowjob on the side. I've personally seen this situation far too many times. But, two times in particular seem to stand out for me. One, an online hookup and potential date, from last Fall, whose fuckery was just too much to deal with. The other, a date from a month ago.

Guy number one, "Homeboy", I met on Adam4Adam. I loved his photos, which later turned out to be completely fake and stolen from an escort's page. The conversation was cute, he seemed intelligent enough, and he had a good job in real estate. With all of that going for him, I figured I would consider talking to him and see it might lead. And, did I mention those hot photos, which he lifted from the sexy escort's page? I mean, he wasn't unattractive, he just wasn't what I expected. Anyway, it was a cold mid-November Saturday night when Homeboy and I decided to hangout at his temporary home, which also housed his family. I got to his place and noticed the difference in his appearance. But, just like he was intelligent enough, over the phone, he was just cute enough, in person, for me to decide not to ask the million dollar question. Plus, I was
curious about him. Not the "I wanna get to know him" kind of curious, but, the "I wanna study him" kind of curious. I mean, I have a guy here who, one, used fake photos online, two, had the balls to meet with me, and three, did feel compelled to address the obvious elephant in the
room. This was a new kind of fuckery, and I had to investigate it further.

Homeboy and I sat on the couch for awhile, channel surfing, until he invited me into a cluttered and cramped guess bedroom, to finish watching "The Borne Supremacy" on HBO. We laid in bed, cuddling, heavy petting, you know, the usual. But, every time I tried to kiss him
anywhere near the mouth, he would do this sly little move where he would try to steer my head to his crotch. Fed up, I asked him what was up. Homeboy then told me that he doesn't kiss anyone until getting to know them better. So, he didn't want to kiss me, yet, he wanted a blowjob. What the fuck kind of logic is that?!?

Mentally, I threw my hands in the air, said "whatever", and gave him some lack-luster head. I mean, I was bored, it was late, and I didn't feel like making a trek all the way back to my place. After I got bored of blowing Homeboy, he got up and went over to a drawed storage
container by the bed. In which case, he pulls out and throws onto the bed a condom and a small jar of "dollar store" Vaseline. I my head, I'm asking myself: "what kind of fuckery is this guy?". I picked up the jar, looked Homeboy square in the eye, and asked what the hell it was for. He
then informs me that its supposed to be "lube". What the fuck is this, that OZ show? I then sighed, looked back at him, and simply stated: "Nah, its really not." I hate when men are uneducated about the "basics" of man-on-man action.

After I shut Homeboy down, we agreed to take our asses to bed. He bitterly slept on his side and I slept on the other, until the morning came, and I took my ass home to sit in front of the TV with a Mcgriddle. After that morning, Homeboy and I never spoke again.

Guy number two, the "Debater", I met back in July. One Saturday, after a week of "sexting" back and forth, we had an impromptu late-night date. There wasn't much romance between us, but, we had a cute time. He took me to Shadow Bar, where I ended up getting another sexy guys' number. We took a late-night stroll around the Gayborhood, which ended in us going to IHOP for whatever meal it is that occurs at three AM. While waiting for our food, we had the chance to really talk. The Debater had a lot going for him. He was not only sexy, but, he was smart-a recent graduate from Los Angeles, who decided move back home, to Chicago, for law school and to teach the art of Debate to high-schooler's. The more we talked, the more i liked him, and seemingly the more chemistry we had.

After IHOP, the Debater and I came back to my place to unwind. We watched a little TV, cuddled, and started fooling around. Between all of the rubbing, touching, and groping, I made my way to kiss him on the lips. While playing with his dick, he gives me the line: "I don't usually kiss somebody til I get to know them..." I then asked him how long that usually takes, which he tells me is two dates. Yet, he was alright with us "sixty-nining" together. I was somewhat fine with that, and we continued our activity. But, not ten minutes later, he broke his little kissing rule, and began the "sex debate". He wanted to have sex, mainly, he wanted to fuck me. I then picked up his earlier line, about kissing, and threw it right back at him.

Needless to say, he didn't like hearing his own line coming from someone else's lips. But, he got over it, and we had a hot little "session" before he left. The Debater and I continued talking, on and off, after that night, but, it just never went anywhere.

My question is this; what is the mentality and reasoning behind the guy who's up for fucking, and everything else under the sun, yet, doesn't want to lip-lock?

About Last Night: The LUXe "Download" Party

Last week, while on vacation from work, I was looking for the perfect way to put a cap on my week off, and the perfect Friday night segway into the weekend. I started the week with a drag show and $1 drinks at Republic, on Monday, and wanted to do something fun yet different then what I was used to. Don't get me wrong, I love The Prop House-maybe because I only go four times a year, in fact, I was there a week before and had a great booze-filled time. I just wanted try meeting a different crowd, at a different venue, other then the "Prop crowd". The Chicago
gays know what I'm talking about. Plus, I wanted to go out, look sexy and seductive, get a little drunk, and "get my life".

Which lead me to this:

LUXe is a new entertainment/party-promoting group in Chicago's Black Gay nightlife. They've thrown a couple events/parties already this summer, including a Blk Gay Pride "thing" in early July. Even though I've been invited to their past events, I wasn't able to check things out, because of my work schedule. Still, I found it interesting that I hadn't heard any of the usual gay "buzzing" about whether or not these parties were the "tea". Ironically, one of this groups' members happens to be Heartbreaker's(HB's) allegedly-crazy ex-boyfriend, while another member happens to be the not so good-looking neighbor that a screwed with last summer during one of my "low" moments. Small world, right?

Anyway, that night, after going to Forever-21 for a cute white fitted v-neck shirt, I came home, called the guys to let them know where to meet-up, and made my nighttime "transformation". Even though it was drizzling out, and I was of course without my umbrella, I didn't let that deter me from my quest to have a great Friday night clubbing with my buddies. Besides, I looked way too sexy to just stay home, on a Friday night, because of a little rain.

Downtown, we made our way to the large castle known as Excalibur Nightclub. Once inside, my buddy quickly pointed out not only how "dead" the place was, but also how "queen-filled" it was, and if we should go somewhere else. I, on the other hand, noticed the lack of eye candy, and told him that it was still an early twelve midnight, and that we should give the place a good thirty minutes to fill up. Plus, after paying ten bucks to get us into that place, i was damn sure going to get my money's worth. That being said, we quickly made a bee-line over to the bar for a couple of "feel good" drinks, to make the situation enjoyable.

Walking around and sipping our drinks, we took in the club's posh atmosphere. The place was beautiful, the bartenders made great drinks, but, the function or party itself wasn't as "cutting edge" is it was advertised to be. Also, the "VIP" sections weren't exactly different from the rest of the place. The only thing separating the "VIPs" and the general crowd was an extra $50 and a velvet rope. In my opinion, the whole event was just a bit too pretentious for its own good. Basically, the creators were trying too hard. I like the "classy-urban" concept behind their events, but, hopefully, after enough trial and error, this entertainment group can tweak things enough to find the right formula for them.

Thirty minutes and one drink later, my southern buddy and I were still bored with the event, and decided to hop on the subway to hangout in the "Gayborhood" on the north side.

;-)